Urban Wildlife

I’m getting tired of people tagging me in every blurry video they find on the internet. ‘Look at this!’ ‘Explain this!’ Half of them are just lads who’ve had three too many pints trying to walk home, and the other half are just bad camera angles and motion blur. If there was something genuinely wrong with the world—something ‘undead’ or apocalyptic—it wouldn’t look this mundane. It wouldn’t be hidden in a grainy ten-second clip of a car park. It would be in your face. It would be undeniable. People are so desperate for something exciting to happen that they’re willing to see monsters in every shadow. It’s boring, it’s repetitive, and I’m done being the one to debunk it. Send me something real or don’t send anything at all.